Lovesuresh - Non Veg Stories-6
Suck and Identify
Hitler conquering another village while WW2 and he decided to give a chance for every woman in this village to save their families.
He made all men to stand naked one next to another in straight line and every woman have to find her husband by doing them blowjob.
First woman starts to suck and saying, "Not mine, not mine, not mine, not mine, Mine!
It turn out that she was right so they could walk away free.
Second woman starts to suck: Not mine, not mine, not mine, not mine, not mine, MINE!!
True again so Hitler was deeply surprised and decided to stand in line between men of village.
Third woman starts to doing her job and saying: Not mine, not mine, not mine , not mine, NOT FROM THIS VILLAGE, not mine......
A Nun and a Priest
A Nun and a Priest were crossing the Sahara desert on a camel. On the third day out, the camel suddenly dropped dead without warning.
After dusting themselves off, the Nun and the Priest surveyed their situation. After a long period of silence, the Priest spoke, "Well, Sister, this looks pretty grim."
"I know, Father. In fact, I don't think it likely that we can survive more than a day or two."
"I agree," says the Father. "Sister, since we are unlikely to make it out of here alive, would you do something for me?"
"I have never seen a woman's breasts and I was wondering if I might see yours..."
"Well, under the circumstances I don't see that it would do any harm."
The Nun opened her habit and the Priest enjoyed the sight of her shapely breasts, commenting frequently on their beauty.
"Sister, would you mind if I touched them?"
She consented and he fondled them for several minutes.
"Father, could I ask something of you?"
"I have never seen a man's penis. Could I see yours?"
"I suppose that would be OK," the Priest replied lifting his robe.
"Oh Father, may I touch it?"
The priest consented and after a few minutes of fondling he was sporting a huge erection.
"Sister, you know that if I insert my penis in the right place, it can give life."
"Is that true Father?"
"Yes, it is, Sister."
"Oh Father, that's wonderful... stick it in the camel and let's get the hell out of here!"
Kheti Ka Naya Farmula
Hamara Ek Dost Tha Mausam, Bada Hi Majakiya Kism Ka Tha.
Gaanv Mein Uska Khet Tha Aur Uske Khet Mein Tamatar Bade Hi Laal Hua Karte The.
Ek Din Uski Padosan Ne Us Se Vajah Puch Li To Usne Bataya
Mausam: “Babhi Ji, Main Roj Subha Pura Nanga Hokar Khet Mein Paani Dalta Hun, Isliye Vo Sharam Se Laal Ho Jaate Hai”
Aurat Khush Hui Aur Usko Idea Pasand Aya Aur Agle Din Usne Apne Khet Mein Nangi Ho Ke Paani Diya
Kuch Der Bad Mausam Ne Dekha Vo Side Mein Udas Khadi Thi Mausam Ne Puch Liya
Mausam: “Babhi Ji Kya Hua Udaas Kyu Ho?”
Aurat: “Kya Batau Ji, Mene Bhi Nangi Hoke Pani Diya, Tamatar To Laal Nahi Hue Par Kheere Jarur Lambe Ho Gaye“
Ek Baar 3 Shikari Aapas Mein Gappe Maar Rahe The, Aur Apne Apne Shikar Ke Kisse Bata Rahe The
Pahla: “Main Jungle Mein Sher Ka Shikar Karne Gaya, Aur Meri Bandook Mein 2 Hi Goliya Thi Aur Achanak Left Aur Right Se 2 Sher Aa Gaye”
Baki Shikari: “Achha Fir?”
Pahla Shikari: “Fir Kya Samne Ek Pathar Pada Tha Mene Usko Goli Mari, Goli Ke 2 Tukde Hue Aur Dono Shero Ko Lag Gayi Aur Vo Mar Gaye”
Dusra Shikari: “Huh Ye Bhi Koi Shikar Hai, Main Batata Hun, Ek Bar Main Sher Ko Marne Gaya, Na Mere Pass Bandook Na Koi Aur Hathiyar, Aur Mere Piche Ek Sher Padd Gaya”
Baki Shikari Hairani Se: “Fir?”
Dusra Shikari: “Fir Kya Tha Main Baag Ke Ek Ped Pe Chadd Gaya Aur Mera Darr Ke Mare Susu Nikal Gaya, Aur Sher Us Susu Ki Rassi Bana Ke Uper Chadne Lag Gaya.”
Baki Shikari: “Fir?”
Dusra Shikari: “Fir Kya Jaisi Hi Vo Adhe Raste Mein Pahuncha Mene Susu Band Kar Diya Vo Niche Gir Ke Mar Gaya”
Teesra Shikari: “Abe Ye To Kuch Bhi Nahi, Ek Bar Main Jungle Mein Gaya Mere Pass Koi Hathiyar Nahi Tha, Mene Dekha Ki Samne Ek Sher Soya Pada Hai”
Baki Shikari: “Fir?”
Teesra Shikari: “Fir Kya, Maine Uski Gaand Mein Ungli Dedi, Vo Bechara Sharam Se Hi Mar Gaya“
Kya Rishta Hai
Hamara Ek Dost Hua Karta Tha Surya Pratap Singh, Bechara Sari Zindagi Ladkiyo Ke Chakkar Kaat Ta Raha Par Kisi Se Bhi Setting Na Ho Payi
Atlast, Kisi Tarha Se Gharwalo Ne Koshish Kar Ek Gaanv Ki Ladki Se Uska Rishta Tay Kar Diya.
Shadi Hui Hum Logo Ne Enjoy Kiya, Aur Wo Suhagrat Manane Chala Gaya
Agle Din Hum Freinds Ne Pucha: “Bhai Fir Kaisi Rahi Fir Teri Suhagrat?”
To Bechara Rote Hue Bola: “Yaar Kuch Bhi Ho Jaye Par Gaanv Ki Ladki Se Shadi Mat Karna”
Humlogo Ne Hairan Hoke Puchha: “Kyu Be Kya Hua? Esa Kyu Kah Raha Hai, Gaanv Ki Ladkiya To Bechari Badi Bholi Hoti Hai”
Rote Hue Bola: “Haan Yaar Thik Bole, Tabhi Mujhe Rat Ko Bolti Hai, Ji Ye Meri Pahli Suhagrat Hai, Agar Koi Galti Ho Jaye, To Mujhe Apni Choti Bahan Samajh Ke Maaf Kar Dena“
One Day There Were Four Nuns In Line For Confession.
The First Nun Said: “Forgive Me, Father, For I Have Sinned.”
Father Asked How?
She Said: “I Saw A Man’s Private Part.”
Father Told Her To Wash Her Eyes With Holy Water.
The Second Nun Comes In And Says: “Forgive Me, Father, For I Have Sinned.”
Father Asked How?
Nun Said: “I Touched A Man’s Private Parts.”
Father Told Her To Wash Her Hands In Holy Water.
Then He Heard The Third And Fourth Nun Fighting.
He Asked Why They Were Fighting.
The Fourth Nun Said, “I’m Not Going To Wash My Mouth In The Holy Water If She Is Going To Sit In It.“
Meesage To The Bar Owner
A lady guest approaches the bar in a small Restaurant.
She calls the guy sitting at the bar then she asks him in a very seductive way to come closer. Then she bends over the desk and starts to caress his beard. ‘Are you the owner of this Bar?’ she asks and touches tenderly his cheek.
‘Ehhh. No. Not at all!‘ man replies.
‘Would you please call the owner here?‘ the women asks and gently touches his hair.
‘Oh, I’m very sorry. But this is not possible right now‘ the man sighs.
‘Would you then please do me a favor?’ the lady follows gently the line of his lips.
‘Of course. What ever you say!‘ the man moans.
‘I want to leave a message for the owner!‘ she says and let first 1 then 2 fingers slip into his mouth which man gently sucks on.
‘What message you want to give him?‘ he asks with the two fingers in his mouth.
‘Please tell him that there is no paper, nor soap, nor towel in the lady’s toilet room!‘
Ek Ladki ki Dastan
Raat ki tanhai me, mai baithi thi akeli
Itne me padosh ke ek ladke ki awaz aai
Aa jao mere paas ghar me koi nahi
Mai kuch sharmai ghabrai
Aur ithlate hui uske paas gai
Usne dhire se ghod me uthaya
Aur bade pyar se bed par sulaya
Sari ka palla giraya
Blouse kholkar bra sarkaya
Besaram ne jhat se mamme ko
Apne mouth me ghusaya
Jhor se daato se mamme ko dabaya
Aur doodh kisi me nahi
Maine kaha mai chudwane aai hu
Maine kaha mai tere bacche ki ma nahi
Phir usne apni anguli
Meri chud me ghusai
Mai jor se chilla padi
Arre Boka choda yeh meri chud hai
Koi hodh nahi
Uska loda bhi ho gaya
Puri tarah khada
Maine bhi use chum kar
Liya bada maja
Kaha usne ab bekarar na karo
Lund ko chud me jane do
Lekin mai thodi itrai
Itni jaldi kya hai
Bus abhi turant to mai aai
Mai le rahi thi ish nok-jhok ka maja
Itne me sale ne meri
Gaand me ghusa diya lauda
Mai jor se chillai
Phir lagi masti aane
Usne phir pyar se dekhte huye
Kaha mai abhi bhi pyasa hu
Pyas meri bujha de re
Ab jyada der na kar
Lund ko chud se mila de re
Mai bhi thi ab uske lund
Ke liye Bekarar
Maine bhi kaha, Jaan
Ab chud hai tere hawale sanam
Chod le ise mauka nai milega aisa phir
Usne bhi jhat apna lund
Mere chud me gaad diya
Maine bhi iska bahut luft liya
Chud ne ka accha andaz tha
Yeh mere jivan ka pehla ahsas tha
Jo bhi ho
Yeh bada khas tha